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Post by {Jedi}Ldr~Twig on Jul 8, 2009 22:23:54 GMT -5
well i was in a funwar today with DbP and i was using dets like always and doing fairly well. This other guy was using reg and nade spamming everything. he used four nades everytime he saw me. he continuely called me a det noob. halfway through the war he asked one of his teammates how to throw a det. i of course laughed at him and asked him how its noobish if he doesn't know how to do it. so it made me wonder, how do you define a noob. to me, this kid who kept calling me a noob was more of a noob.
so it got me thinking, what makes a "noob" a noob. to me, a noob is someone who uses the basics. by basics i mean when you learn a new game, it is the first thing you learn. I think most of us, at least some of us, started out with reg and throwing nades and that sort of thing. then we made our way to rocket then engineer than sniper. maybe not that order, but as you go through there, you learn their equipment. you learn how to hold down a botton and move the mouse hitting your targe 10% of the time and you learn how to hit another button and watch a firey red thing come out of your other hand. then you move on to other things.
What is a "noob" to you?
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Post by allcaps on Jul 8, 2009 22:42:46 GMT -5
Well to be honest twig calling someone a noob while your using the name "twig" is kinda bad representation of the {Jedi} clan. But I would call someone who doesn't know how to walk a noob  |
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Post by {Jedi}Ldr~Twig on Jul 8, 2009 23:47:24 GMT -5
i actually never called him a noob. want to see the chat? lol. i have it.
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Post by {Jedi}GoA.Terminator on Jul 8, 2009 23:54:28 GMT -5
Well, that's a very interesting question. To me, a noob is someone who uses the easiest methods of killing. They depend on just that one thing to kill, and they have no real skill with anything else. If that method were taken away from them, then they would be very defenseless since they only use that method to kill.
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Post by Tchdwn11 on Jul 9, 2009 0:16:04 GMT -5
I define a noob as someone who is new to the game. For a person's first 5 or so games, they are a noob because they are learning the ins and outs of the game. From then on, noone is really a noob, they just suck. By Law, and i do mean law haha, when someone is calling other people noobs, that person isn't very good.
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Post by ender on Jul 9, 2009 8:08:33 GMT -5
Ah yes, this is an easy one. "Noob" is a term that is one of many representations of the dilemna that is what we shall call the deteriation of the english language (and spelling  ). You see, I believe that some people on the internet decided to added the term, "noob" to our common usage because they thought it would be funny to see the human race become cattle. "Lol! You're such a noooooooooooooooooooooooooooob!" |
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Post by {Jedi}Ldr~Twig on Jul 9, 2009 8:22:19 GMT -5
lol ender. urban dictionary?
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Post by Jose on Jul 9, 2009 20:47:13 GMT -5
A newbie is someone who is relatively new to an old game. I am a newbie (i've been playing for three months now). A Noon or n00b is someone who takes the most effective ways of killing people, and uses them. However, when he n00b uses them they fail at doing so, such as in Halo: A noob uses a vehicle called the ghost, which can easily run over someone and has strong machine guns with infinite ammo. He noon gets one kill out of this vehicle while an experienced player could easily get 5. Also, with the worst equipment, an experienced player is better than a noob with the worst equipment. A noob also thinks they are good when after getting killed 5 times by one person, they kill that person once, AFTER that person has been weakened.
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Post by ender on Jul 9, 2009 23:14:52 GMT -5
no twig, that is my definition. I did not think you would realize at first what I meant by "cattle", so I inserted an example so you would not miss it  But yea, even though I do use it at times, it is obvious that our vocabulary is not as great as it was 50 years ago. |
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×Path'en×
Banned
^Top~Cat^
~ Meow ~
Posts: 655
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Post by ×Path'en× on Jul 10, 2009 0:40:23 GMT -5
no twig, that is my definition. I did not think you would realize at first what I meant by "cattle", so I inserted an example so you would not miss it But yea, even though I do use it at times, it is obvious that our vocabulary is not as great as it was 50 years ago. cattle as in "mob mentality" people whom are simple minded enough to not think for themselfs surcome to the will of the crowd... "your such a loser, NOOB!" "yea, noob!!!" etc etc. and thus it starts  My def.noob = newbie one who is new to the game or doesnt not know how to play well or at all (even if they have play'd for while). People have over used that term so much so people just use it as a simple insult to mock other players, even when they are good or bad. Tis is my def. of teh word "Noob" :3 |
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Post by {Jedi}Ldr~Twig on Jul 10, 2009 1:58:06 GMT -5
i know what cattle is, but the example helped let me know how you related the word noob to the cattle which i found kinda cool. lol.
urband dictionary:
1. Noob 8828 up, 1186 down
A. INTRO
I. What is this?
II. Defining 'Noob'
B. COMMON NOOB CHARACTERISTICS
I. Noobish
II. Where to find noobs
III. Behavior of noobs
IV. Noob religion
V. More about noob habitats
C. AVOIDING NOOBS
I. Make sure you aren't one
II. Major noob avoiding strategies
------------------------
A. INTRO
I. What is this?
This guide is designed to give you a better understanding of what a noob is, how to recognize them, some details about them, and how to avoid or get rid of them. It mostly applies to online forums, which are the main targets of migrating noobs.
II. Defining 'Noob'
Contrary to the belief of many, a noob/n00b and a newbie/newb are not the same thing. Newbs are those who are new to some task* and are very beginner at it, possibly a little overconfident about it, but they are willing to learn and fix their errors to move out of that stage. n00bs, on the other hand, know little and have no will to learn any more. They expect people to do the work for them and then expect to get praised about it, and make up a unique species of their own. It is the latter we will study in this guide so that the reader is prepared to encounter them in the wild if needed.
Noobs are often referred to as n00bs as a sign of disrespect toward them, and it's often hella funny, but I will refer to them as noobs during this reading.
* Usually the topic at hand on an internet forum.
B. COMMON NOOB CHARACTERISTICS
I. Noobish
Often, but not always, noobs will attempt to communicate in their own primitive language, known as "n00bish." It is a variant of the hacker language that exposes them as having little intelligence or will to learn. Here is an example of some noobish. Do not attempt to comprehend it: it cannot be discerned without professionals at hand.
stFU /../..an, i r teh r0xx0rz liek emin3m, u cna go tO EHLL OR ATLE4St help m3 wit hthIS!!111!!!!!!!1~~1!!``!! LOLLOLOLLOLOLlOoLLOlollLLl u n00b
Although you may find this unbelievably funny and/or annoying, it is best to restrain yourself and keep from talking back to them, as they are very territorial and easily angered. This will result in their attempted verbal abuse of you, possibly backed up by other noobs, because they work in packs when doing offensive tasks. It is not an easy task to learn this language because our intelligent accent will keep it from sounding quite right when spoken. You can write some simple noobish of your own, however, by slamming your face into your keyboard repeatedly.
II. Where to find n00bs
On the internet, n00bs make their colonies on forums. They migrate in waves, usually on weekends, and proceed to clog up bandwidth with stupid questions and sometimes even stupid answers. If you happen to be unfortunate enough to be on a board large enough to attract migrating noobs, there will hopefully be authority in charge who is smart enough to take extermination measures before they can make nests and larger colonies. THE BANNER HAMMER is one form of authority.
Larger colonies can result in the mutation of some into spammers. Not commercial spammers, but pointless spammers. A noob can become one of these at any point, but the larger the amount of noobs, the more chance pointless spammers will appear.
Off the internet, noobs appear anywhere the focus is on learning or discussing something specific.
III. Behavior of noobs
Since noobs are basically ignorant bastards, they have a lot in common. The most often seen characteristic is their fluency in noobish, which is why it got its own section. They will also be very self confident as if they were the absolute best at what they are in fact the worst at. Also, they are quite agressive and self-centered, and tend to laugh a lot using many L's and O's in rapid sucession (the noobish word for laughing like an ultimate retard).
It is their instinct to assemble in packs for defense, and they often attempt to organize packs that they call teams. Unfortunately for them, teams usually result in a total loss of communication and they can often begin to fight amongst each other. These teams are quite unlike those formed by non-noobs.
Noobs have difficulty reading English and cannot comprehend the idea of authority.
Therefore, they have an all-out disregard for rules, basic or not. A good way to identify a noob (bad) vs. a newb (good) is to tell them (or have an authority tell them) which rule they are unknowingly breaking. If they respond with an apology and fix it, they are probably not a noob. If they react by insulting everything around them in rapid noobish and causing general mayhem, it is because they are a noob and have had a small seizure due to their inability to understand what is happening.
IV. Noob Religion
Noobs follow a variation of the 1337 (sometimes 7331) religion, in which they worship the number in odd rituals and put altars in their forum avatars and signatures. They often call themselves 1337, which experts say is somewhat like calling themselves godly in a human language. It's best to not interfere with their religious fantasies and practices because that can lead to a noob uprising, which can turn a forum to mush in less than a week.
V. More about noob habitats
Noobs often attempt to maintain their own web pages. Some common features of these lairs are a terrible lack of content, background music, lots of pointless animated gifs, and pages that say some variation of 'tHEir isnothinG H34r yEtt LOLLOLOL!111!1!!~~~!!`! 13371337', which means 'Nothing here yet' in noobish.
They will also have large, seemingly infinite marquees of 88X31 affiliate buttons replaced with red X's scattered here and there, and possibly a hit counter showing a number less than 100. These habitats are numerous but fairly easy to avoid because only noobs link to them. So if you can identify a noob, don't go to its homepage. Simple as that.
C. AVOIDING NOOBS
I. Make sure you aren't one
Note: This section is bilingual so even noobs can make the discovery if they haven't already.
English (T4lk)-
Read the above parts of this guide carefully. If you find yourself unable to comprehend any of it but are instead beginning to think about how great you are and how awesome 'teh 1337' is, you might want to take one of the many available online quizzes to check your noobancy.
Noobish (133713371337)- Liek, u gott4 re3D teh gudieCAREFUl1y and tehn OMG LIEK I AM R0XX0RZ ya anD ify 0u turn into teh reTARDED u gota go 2 MY WEBP4GE LOLLOLOL!!111~11 ad check 4 warez n stfuu. if u r a n00b go2HELL LOLLOLOlROFLMFAO11!!!11!!!! a/s/l pos gtg n00b suxx0rz ur b0xx0rz OLOOOLOLLLL HELP HELP HELP 1337133713371337
II. Major noob avoiding strategies
The main factor in attracting migrating herds of noobs is a large, active forum. If you find one of these, look to see if it has the management to avoid noob infestation. If not, look for a small or mid-sized forum that covers the same topic so you can enjoy your time there before the noobs find it.
Another way to keep noobs from interfering with your life is to become part of the authority on one of these forums. But that's often hard to do so you'll probably be better off avoiding larger forums first off. If you do manage to become part of the authority, however, take full advantage of it and establish extermination policies so that normal people can have a nice time without noob infestations.
Noob Talk: LAlWAlwalwalWAWLAWLAWA!~!~!~!!!11!!! 1M NOtttt N0000BZ
its long but i copy and pasted the entire thing because it makes me laugh.
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×Path'en×
Banned
^Top~Cat^
~ Meow ~
Posts: 655
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Post by ×Path'en× on Jul 11, 2009 4:39:10 GMT -5
I lol'd at the "Noob religion" as tho they are some sort of cult lmao
"LAlWAlwalwalWAWLAWLAWA!~!~!~!!!11!!! 1M NOtttt N0000BZ" priceless...
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Post by {Jedi}Ldr~Twig on Jul 11, 2009 11:35:45 GMT -5
These are the rememberable parts...
If they react by insulting everything around them in rapid noobish and causing general mayhem, it is because they are a noob and have had a small seizure due to their inability to understand what is happening.
You can write some simple noobish of your own, however, by slamming your face into your keyboard repeatedly.
Since noobs are basically ignorant bastards, they have a lot in common....They will also be very self confident as if they were the absolute best at what they are in fact the worst at.
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). You see, I believe that some people on the internet decided to added the term, "noob" to our common usage because they thought it would be funny to see the human race become cattle. 
